Self Defense Situations by Kevin Quigley
There is no fair…
When you’re being mugged, raped, attacked, there is no fair. The bad guys want to hurt you – maybe kill you. The bad guys will do any and everything to get what they want.
Your mission is to defeat them and get away. Your mission may adjust to defeat and punish them and get away. But your mission must always be to defeat them and get away.
Your mission, to defeat them and get away, relies first and foremost on something called Situational Awareness. The U.S. military defines Situational Awareness as “…the ability to identify, process, and comprehend the critical elements of information about what is happening with regards to the mission. More simply, it’s knowing what is going on around you.”
The Knockout Game
Walking along the sidewalk, two or three people are coming the other way. They’re talking and joking. As we begin to pass each other, one or more may even make eye contact as if to nod hello. Suddenly, one launches across towards me, drawing back their arm to try to land a savage punch to my head to try to knock me out.
Situational awareness comes in well in advance. As we walk toward each other, I have all my attention focused on them. As we pass, I look for movement of any of them toward me. As the puncher launches himself toward me, I step away and bend forward at the waist and nail him with a defensive rear kick to the solar plexus. I step forward after the kick and turn around into a horse stance, facing perpendicular to the attacker. If he’s still standing, I rear leg muay thai kick him either (a) to the groin if it’s available or (b) to his face if he’s bent over.
I move to the first accomplice and snap kick him to the groin. If he bends over, I repeat the snap kick to the groin if it’s available or to his head if he’s bent over.
I double-check both attackers who are down and, if necessary, stomp them again to put them out.
Accomplice 2 may have run away at this point or may be prepared for a snap kick to the groin. So I fake the snap kick and step forward into a horse stance facing perpendicular to him and sidefist him to the nose. As his head snaps back, I rear leg muay thai kick him to the groin and step back into the horse stance. If (a) he bends forward, I rear leg muay thai kick him to the face or (b) is still upright, I repeat the rear leg muay thai kick to the groin.
I stomp all three one more time to make sure they’re out. I leave.
Valet parking - Tip a kid or fight off an ambush
Some restaurants offer valet parking. To choose to park for free, sometimes a few blocks or a hundred yards away in a dark parking lot or backlots or city alleys or streets, or to pay a kid $5 or $10 to park and bring your car to you, seems pretty straightforward to me. I try to avoid putting myself in potentially risky situations so if valet parking is available, I take advantage of it.
If valet is not available, I try to park under or near a light, walk to and from my car in the middle of the lane scanning side-to-side and behind constantly and pause and check both around my car and behind me before moving to my car. I also have the key in hand, honk the horn and flash the lights using the remote, and tuck the key into my palm to use as a weapon, if needed.
However…if I am getting into my car and someone steps around and tries to push their way through the open driver’s door into the driver’s seat, as they reach my level, I will use one hand to trap any weapon they may have and I will target their eye (probably right eye) with my other hand, ripping the eyeball out if I have to. If I don’t use my key, they’ll get either an index-and-middle finger gouge or thumb gouge. I will hook into their eye socket with my one hand and continue to trap the weapon with my other hand as I push my way out of the car.
Once out, he will try to swing or grab at me with his free hand. But I will keep pressure in his eye, trap the weapon against him and keep his free hand on the opposite side of me. I will then stomp him in the knee to break it as I push him to the ground with my fingers firmly planted in his eye socket. He will need to release the weapon before I release his eye…but once he releases the weapon and I gain control of it and before I release his eye, I will use his weapon on him.
Then I leave.
Parking lot follies – why I always open and close my wife’s car door
When my wife and I travel by car, I open her door for her when she enters or leaves the car. I was trained to do so by my parents…and I’m what used to be called a gentleman.
Situational awareness makes me recognize that if it looks like we may be accosted near the car, I do not want her to be a victim or a hostage. My mission is to protect her as she gets into the vehicle and to get her into the vehicle quickly. I’d rather she be locked safely in the car, honking the horn and flashing the lights to distract any attackers.
The same rules apply here as above. If valet parking is not available, I try to park under or near a light, we walk to and from the car in the middle of the lane scanning side-to-side and behind constantly and pause and check both around the car and behind us before moving to the car. I also have the key in hand, honk the horn and flash the lights using the remote, and tuck the key into my palm to use as a weapon, if needed.
If we see anyone approaching us near the car, I get my wife into the car, give the keys to her and tell her to lock the doors, start the car, start honking and flashing lights and call 911.
Turning to face the attackers, I check to see their weapons. I stay between them and my wife in the car, who is moving into the driver’s side to start the car.
There are two attackers, one with a knife and one with a pipe. They attack at the same time. I move to the outside of the attacker with the pipe, keeping him between the knife-wielder and me. He is trying an overhead smash with the pipe. I hit his outside knee with a side kick and smash through it so he starts falling. As he falls, I push him into the knife-wielder, pinning the knife between the two of them. I reach across the falling attacker and four-finger eye strike to the knife-wielder, as many times as I can hit him in the eyes. If he reacts by pulling his head back, I half-fist him to the throat as many times as I can.
I then elbow smash the pipe wielder so he falls to the ground. I stomp him to put him out. I take my belt off and snap it to hit the knife-wielder in the eyes again, block any knife thrusts and swing the buckle end around my head to hit him in his head. If he hasn’t dropped the knife yet, I pick up the pipe and use it to smash his knife arm and/or head till he drops the knife. I then smash his head till he drops to the ground.
I get in the car and we leave.
What I tell my wife to do
When walking on a sidewalk, my wife is always on the outside of the sidewalk, away from the street. We walk arm-in-arm or holding hands and I force others to go around us. We keep to the outside of anyone coming the other way so I am always between them and her. If someone is passing us, I always keep myself between them and her. My situational awareness is always on overdrive as I scan any and all coming either way for any signs of potential threats, making eye contact with others to steer them away. Sometimes we’ll be in conversation as we walk and I’ll be so focused not on her that she’ll have to repeat what she said later, when we’re in a safe situation.
She knows to keep her purse slung across her body and between her and me. If we make it more difficult for a purse-snatcher, perhaps they’ll pass on by.
If grabbed when alone, my wife has been taught to kick her attacker(s) in the groin repeatedly. She will also claw eyes and scream as loudly as she can. She will also run away as quickly as she can, when released. She will, however, give up her purse rather than lose her life.
If we’re attacked when we’re together, she is to get behind me and fall to the ground as if she fainted. This will hopefully put her in a safe position, away from the attackers and provide a distraction for me to use against them: “Oh my God, my wife has a bad heart! You’ve probably killed her!” If they hesitate, I will be able to attack based on their numbers and weapons.
When not to fight: the ballgame drunk
True story – sitting with three of my sons at a 2013 World Series game, there’s a group of 4 guys behind us getting drunker every inning. One of the guys starts heckling my youngest son, John. His brother Michael turns around and yells at the guy to back off and leave us alone. The guy stands up as if to start something. All four of us stand up and turn to face him. Only one of his buddies stands up with him – the other two look sheepishly away.
I ask him: “Do you really want to do this now?” The guy looks at us and doesn’t answer. I tell my sons to be cool and announce loudly that I’m going to find Security. I walked out and looked around for a minute for a Security person and, of course, didn’t find any. But when I got back I announced loudly that Security would there in a few minutes. Everyone sits down.
The guy leaves and I tell his buddy that he needs to get his friend under control or things will end very badly for him. The friend says he barely knows the guy, knows that he’s had at least 8 beers and is really drunk but doesn’t know how to get him under control.
The drunk guy returns and there is relative peace for a couple of innings. Then the guy has a couple more beers and thinks it’s really funny to start yelling at the top of his voice: “Cold beer here!” He does this multiple times, stopping only when I turned to ask him to stop doing that.
After a brief interlude, the drunk guy again starts yelling “Cold beer here!” at the top of his lungs, thinking it’s really funny. My son Michael loses it again and yells at the gut to “Shut the $%@! up!” The drunk guy and his one buddy stand again. I repeat the same “go find the non-existent Security people” scenario as earlier, which calms everyone down again.
As this is going on I think: “Here’s this guy drunk out of his mind. If I do anything to him in the stadium, it’s going to be messy because he’ll throw up all over the place…I may have to deal with his buddy too…the cops will ask ‘Wait, you’ve been drinking diet Coke and you hit him first? Who sounds more stupid, the drunk or the sober guy?’…we would get thrown out of the stadium at best and maybe spend some time in some nasty police room.” That was my analysis of the situation at the time.
So I leaned over to my sons and said, “OK, time to go.” They had no problem as the Cardinals were losing and it was the 8th inning. So we left.
Cards lost in the 9th when Kolten Wong got picked off of first base.